I mean...
- We have almost everything we could ever want. And if we don't, we can get it on credit.
- Information is unloaded to us instantly from everywhere and anywhere.
- The luxeries of life surround us. I mean, seriously. We don't have bring in our own bath water, heat it ourselves. We don't have to grow our own food. We don't even have to go outside for the toilet. Or wash our clothes in a river. Or takes months to travel the world. Or have easy access to books and education. Or music. Or entertainment. In fact, it's everywhere.
- And yet, having all these things hasn't cured the hunger behind every soul. To be heard. To be accepted. No amount of money or possessions will ever fully impress the crew you're wanting to. It's the person you are that makes that possible
- Which brings us to the fact that there are so many self-help books, diets, everything to try and change ourselves, our very beings. To become like the god-like figures on the OC or Grey's Anatomy or High Fashion runways. But we always fail. And move on to the next one. (Save, of course, the select few people these things work for).
- We're ADD. Moving on from one problem to the next without resolving any. One subject to the other without mastery any. One hope, dream, love, fear for another in an instant.
- I wonder, if having all these things laid out for us, and not really having to produce anything with our own hands has caused this sort of frustration. Yes, we can work a job and buy a mansion, filling it with great things. But, I don't think it means the same as if I had built the house myself, the furniture myself.. or at least have bought it from an actual person that I know who made it. It's like we're living in a phony reality. And it's breaking us apart. And making us angry.
- And I'm amongst the most broken of them all.
It's funny how culture, society, and your own history can work against you. I have worked through countless problems over and over and over and over and over again, and yet... they still manage to rear their ugly heads. They refuse to be tamed. They will take a back seat while I think I'm sorting my life, but in the end bite me in the butt. They won't be conquorerd. And every now and then I notice I am so very angry, when I generally have no right to be. Which makes me realize, things that have happened to us in the past will have to be beat down and down again.
It's not that they're not ultimately conquorered, they are. The blood of the lamb did that. Satan is conquerored and yet he still continues to rear his ugly head. I mean, look at the atrocities happening in Burma by a government in place to protect the people, but who are actually refusing aid and spending all their resources on keeping reporters out, rather than helping bury the dead and bring food and fresh water to its people. Look at China, and the horrible earthquake that killed so many. We still live in a fallen world. With fallen people. With fallen hopes, dreams, ideas, and marketing plans. But, Jesus is the conqueror. He won. He beat death and has one. I guess it's one of the paradoxes of the faith... why didn't Jesus just come back immediately after he rose from the dead and save us from such agony and pains? Why is he victorious, but from seemingly far away, in a world run amuk? To be honest, I have absolutely no idea. But I do know that when we do know why, we'll slap our heads and sigh "that makes SO much sense!" But, it's gonna be one day. Until then, we must get along in this fallen world ministering to the broken and poor. Not just economically poor--spiritually poor as well. Until then, we must keep fighting the anger battle. We must find something to work for with our own hands. We must find a cause to labor for while not being distracted by the alluring (and in themselve good) options.
In the end, I guess it comes down once more to remaining in God's love. Perhaps that's why life issues will surface and resurface, and not be healed instantaneously. As painful as it is, we can never forget who and what Jesus saved us from. Nor can we begin to think that our salvation was a one off thing and I can move on by myself, thank you very much. No. We must depend, love and trust on Jesus every day. Always turning back to him to help us.
And it absolutely sucks. I've always been one to sort things myself and get on with it. I hate having to feel like I must depend on anyone. Especially one who I cannot have a physical conversation with. I'm absolutely the worst at this. And it's something that I desperately need God to help me with. In this angry world yearning for him.
